I have a confession to make. While the whole world was bashing the launch of MissTravel.com, the curious-kitty in me decided to take the plunge, indulge in my own investigation, and formulate my own conclusions. After all, shouldn’t we be doing that with everything in life? I made a profile and was interested in meeting someone from the site in person to truly understand their motives for joining.
My Back Story/Inspiration:
Those who know me on a personal level can easily describe me as a “glass-half-full” type of gal. Always joyful, positive, and perhaps a bit idealistic (though never naive, don’t confuse the two), I’m fearless when it comes to stepping out of my own comfort zone, because let’s face it – that’s usually where the magic happens when it comes to self-discovery and growth. When we put ourselves in obscure situations, we tend to learn many of our valuable life lessons.
On a recent trip to Chicago with some of my girlfriends, my free-spirited friend Allison, told me about how she has been hosting dozens of strangers on her couch while filming a documentary about CouchSurfing.com. At first I was shocked that she easily trusted strangers that she only knew from an online profile, but after listening to her reasoning, she was absolutely right in my eyes. Her response was something along the lines of, “many people live in fear and expect the worst from people. You have to believe in the common good of the universe and you’ll attract that. In fact, out of every single person from around the world that has stayed with us on my couch, zero have been negative experiences. I’ve made dozens of like-minded friends and learned quite a bit so far.”
Back to MissTravel… let me first say that I have never had a profile on any online “dating” website ever in my life. Nor have I been on a “blind date”. I’m quite sheltered from modern dating, I guess. This was about to be a completely new [and slightly uncomfortable] experience for me. While making my profile, I made sure that there was nothing suggestive in my writing and photos. I was not looking for a sugar daddy, casual sex, or any kind of dubious arrangement. I merely wanted to meet with a fellow travel enthusiast for lunch or coffee.
My Main Photo
Considering that my main photo was not the slightest bit suggestive or “promiscuous”, I was shocked that I actually received dozens of messages from “generous” members and about 10 “trip proposals” within the first few days of being on the site. Men from around the globe asked me to travel with them to luxurious places such as Hong Kong, St. Kitts, Hawaii, and Rome – just to name a few.
Some of my trip proposals on MissTravel
While I did not respond to many of the messages, I did have contact with two members in particular. Of the two that I responded to was a man in his early thirties from Australia who reports on his profile that his annual income is over $1 million dollars. He had mentioned to me that he would be visiting New York for two weeks and was interested in getting to know me over brunch.
I agreed – we’d be in a crowded public place, what’s the worst that can happen? Of course I told my parents and close friends what I was doing, who I was meeting, and where I was going for safety reasons. And I made it very clear in all of my contact that this was a brunch-and-only-brunch kind of meeting.
The Meeting
Before meeting “MrTravel” on Saturday at 11 am at a trendy Chelsea brunch hot-spot called CookShop, I met up with my close blogger-buddy, Bonnie, who also happened to be in NYC that morning at the Westin in Times Square. I told her what I was doing and how I was super nervous (so nervous that I almost bailed) because I have never met anyone from an online site before. She thankfully rested nerves and told me to pretend I was Diane Sawyer conducting an investigative interview. She was right. It was just brunch… and a blog post.
When I arrived at CookShop, MrTravel was there waiting outside and we were immediately escorted (bad word?) to our table. I was actually pleasantly surprised by how much we had in common. Our conversation and laughter felt totally normal, and there was never an awkward silence. It was a fantastic experience. I initially expected brunch to last about 45 minutes, and I couldn’t believe that a whole two and a half hours flew by!
So what did we talk about? Everything from travel (duh), to Chinese medicine, to spider bites, to cancer… and what seemed like everything in between. Of course I had to ask him the obvious – Why exactly did he join MissTravel?
He told me that he also primarily joined out of curiosity because the site was receiving so much media attention during its immediate debut. He was open-minded about the idea of meeting locals during his travels. He also said that being in a new global city every week for work is very lonely. He described himself as a self-proclaimed foodie who enjoys trying a different restaurant at every meal but does not like to dine alone. Traveling to him is learning, and there’s no better way to experience culture than to sit down and talk to the people who live in it.
I also asked him how many people he’s met since being on the site, and he said I was his 4th brunch date.
After brunch was over, we shook hands and parted ways. Now, who says there’s no such thing as free lunch?
The Verdict
With any situation in life, you will attract what you project. You are in control of every interaction you have in life. Whether you’re meeting somebody on the street, at a business meeting, or even on a site like MissTravel, it’s important to be smart and set your boundaries. In all honesty, I’m proud of myself for stepping out of my comfort zone – I have a new-found confidence (I can apparently survive in the online-dating world, LOL) and a positive experience to look back on.
P.S. – if the idea of traveling with a stranger still creeps you out, or perhaps you’re all “miss independent”, you can always travel for free using my favorite method – by picking up the best travel credit card with an awesome sign-up bonus.
Thanks for the Cookshop tip!
Great blog topic. Interesting experience. It’s amazing how many people keep their fears from preventing them from doing things. Way to put yourself out there. :)
Omg… If I was your boyfriend, I would call that cheating! But u did it for fun with no intentions of moving forward from the brunch date
That is so interesting!
Too bad guys can’t get free lunch :P
I’m a little disturbed by the “attractive” and “generous” labels. I think it’s a great idea to help you find people in the places you travel or someone to travel with but I wish there was a way to meet as equals…
what did you boyfriend think?
Interesting blog post, never heard of the website, but it sounds like a great idea for us travelers.
I agree with Jess, what’s with the “generous” and “attractive” labels? Is there anything on the site to find just a travel buddy where you each pay for your own travel?
Great article. I certainly feel more open to reviewing “MissTravel” site now. Thanks
If only I was attractive. :)
@Dan: it was a great place!
@Debbie: thanks! It was definitely an interesting experience and I was pleasantly surprised!
@Jamison and oneeyejack: I’m very fortunate that Kevin is supportive! We have a very secure relationship so he was fine with it :)
@Jess and Sam: I agree that the generous and attractive labels might steer people away. I guess every site will try to find their distinguishing “niche” in order to stay competitive lol. However there are no specific “level of attractiveness” or “level of generousness” standards in place so I guess anyone could join (though generous members must pay to use the site). I’d love to find a generic travel buddy website too!! Right now I’ve been soliciting my friends on Facebook for travel buddies lol.
Interesting post. I doubt his reasons for joining. That’s a safe and cliched answer. His true reasons were probably sexual since the site is clearly designed as a wink-wink quid pro quo of sex and travel. It’s less brazen than say AshleyMadison, but it’s clear what misstravel.com pitches.
Another reason I think his true motives were sexual is that there are much bigger non-sexual sites that offer the service he wants, namely couchsurfing, which is the easiest way in the world to find a brunch buddy in a new city. But MissTravel offers what couchsurfing does not, a self selected pools of girls who consider themselves pretty enough for it to be a good deal to buy them a plane ticket.
If Bonnie gave you the Diane Sawyer advice just to calm your nerves, that’s nice of her. But in general I think it’s a bad idea to go into any meeting with a new person with the mindset that it’s an investigative interview. It’s a way of not fully engaging or committing. Many girls do this on dates set up online, and it never leads to a good outcome for either party. I think the idea to treat the date like an interview or experiment or something of the like is a way for most girls to rationalize that they are on a dating site. They’re thinking, “I’m not some loser who needs online dating. I’m here to find out why he joined, and if I meet someone great…” I’m not saying you had that thought process. In fact since you mention a boyfriend in the comments, it’s clear you weren’t treating this as a date at all. But it’s a common thought process to protect the ego of the girl, and it eliminates the possibility of a connection.
In the end I would say that MissTravel piqued my interest, so I was interested in a first hand account. But I don’t think you signed up for the site for its intended purpose–do you?– so I’m still left with questions about the site’s operations.
For the most part sex is implied with the site. If some guy is taking you on a trip that costs thousands of bucks I am pretty sure some quid pro quo is expected…
A brunch meeting… well, thats probably just the warm up ;-)
Thanks for taking the risk. I just might do the same. “Every now and then you gotta say WTF…” Risky Business
@MileValue: First off, great blog – I find myself reading it more and more frequently recently, and thanks for taking the time to comment on the post. You’ve raised a lot of interesting points, and with this being such a controversial blog topic to begin with, I had expectations of a variety of comments from all kinds of viewpoints. In one aspect, I agree with you – MissTravel’s marketing message seems to be a little concerning in some areas, but unlike CouchSurfing, who’s audience tends to be low-budget backpackers, MissTravel is trying to appeal to a different demographic – the wealthy, “stylish” traveler as most members on the site tend describe themselves as. Based on the profiles of several “generous” members on the site, they all seem to project that they want to (and can afford to) experience the “high life” and “luxury”, so I can understand the appeal of having “attractive” members. Take a look at Las Vegas, and even the entire night life industry itself – the marketing behind that industry defines luxury as being around beautiful people. In fact, the night life industry is the 3rd most profitable industry in the world at this point – so there’s definitely a large viable market.
Do I necessarily choose to live “the high life”? No so much. (after all, being a points and miles fanatic is the travel version of extreme couponing LOL). But I do understand where the seed is planted.
You’re right – I was not treating this as a date at all and frankly I don’t think he was either. Right there on my profile it says that I am a blogger, and I also indicated that I was only interested in friendship and I was open to meeting men and women (no, I’m not bi-sexual). I received dozens of messages from men from around the world, and usually by reading the first sentence of their message, I can see what their intentions were. Like anything in life, you just have to ignore and disregard the ones that don’t align. However, the two I spoke to seemed “normal”. I told them I was a blogger, and that I wasn’t looking for any type of meeting besides brunch (I even told them I’d blog about it). They were fine with that. There were no “expectations” after brunch. And even if he had hopes of something, the boundaries were pre-set and there were no mixed signals.
To be completely honest, most of the people on the site are frequent flyers like you and I, and have top-tier elite status with airline and hotel loyalty programs. Most are self-employed and have the time and resources to travel freely as they choose. Being self-employed myself, it’s extremely hard for me to find a travel buddy in my immediate group of friends. I’m 25 so most of my friends have 9-5 jobs and are still paying off student loans. It would be nice to meet someone (man, woman, or group) who I can see the world with (I’m sure my Dad and Kevin are getting tired of me soliciting them with a monthly vacation haha).
Would I travel with anyone on the site? Perhaps, but it would take A LOT of getting to know them. That’s not even on my agenda anytime soon. I’m happy I was able to step out of my comfort zone to meet someone in person at this point. I find it hard enough to travel with some of my close friends.
I don’t ever feel the need to “owe” anyone anything. When a guy decides to send me or one of my girlfriends a drink at the bar, the only thing we “owe” him is a smile and a thank you – whether his intention is “just to be nice” or something else, that’s a risk he’s taking and I’m sure guys know that. Bottom line: you’re always in control of every situation you find yourself in life :)
@FlyThai: I certainly agree that they should restructure the message on the site, but it’s up to the users to choose how to present and use the site.
@Beth: That was my attitude! Just be safe and be very straightforward with your intention! :)
That’s a good comparison to a guy buying you a drink. Thanks for posting this; I look forward to reporting back when I sign up for MisterTravel.
Interesting, I was looking for some reviews on the traveling part, but good to know about the free lunches. I also do CouchSurfing. Well get us post it if you know about the traveling part. Thank you for your post :)
Ladies…great write up. Advice to ladies – Most men will expect sex after any little contribution they give be it brunch, a tissue to wipe your nose, or a plane ticket. Men are men. This site just helps eliminate the broke sad ones who want sex for a grain of salt. As we play the game better we feel a lot better if the date goes south.
Nice article, but all guys know this is for sex (be it a delayed method). I signed up, met a Euro girl, and essentially paid for sex (flight, going out, etc). Not going to sugar coat it. She was fun and wanted to stay. If I were a girl and attractive/well off guy said “I’ll fly you to X and pay for everything” it would be kind of dim witted to not think sex to be involved IMO. Best of luck in the tough world of acting.
You live in USA, New York. I live myself in North of Europe, have been very popular on another free dating sites, but haven´t got anything from here, been a member since August, feeling very disappointed.
I write about my MissTravel dating site´s experiences as an attractive member here:
http://misstraveltripsblog.wordpress.com/
http://misstraveltrips.blogspot.fi/
https://twitter.com/misstraveltrips
Be careful some of these women lied about their age. If you travel domestic with them, then it is easier for them to hide their true age, but if you travel outside the U.S. territories you need a passport, then you be shocked to find out the true age of some of these women.
I had one Asian lady in the Silicon Valley area that took off 7 years from her real age from her profile. She is actually in her mid 40’s She is a scam. She is on both SeekingArrangement.com and MissTravel.com and is a career prostitute for years and she closes and re-opens her accounts and telling the men on these sites that she is new to this kind of stuff. Well, she is not. She is a liar and I spent a lot of money on her and she didn’t put out much. I had to replace her. She has stretch marks all over her stomach , but pretty pale skin and has nice pair of legs. She always wear makeup, but when she takes it off she looks like a dog. She has one child so don’t let her scam you.
Americans are such prudes. I would never invite an American girl on a sugar date or trip and this woman is a perfect example of why. Of course sex is expected you morons. SeekingArrangement, misstravel and nameyourprice are all about normal girls and normal men engaging in paid sexual agreements. Dating by agreement is an interesting, beneficial and fun way to meet new people that you would not ordinarily consider in real life situations.
It’s paid companionship and sex by consenting adults. Get over it.
I was in need of a female travel companion to go with me to Hawaii toward the end of 2017 and I had quite a few beautiful women to choose from very quickly after I posted my trip proposal on MissTravel. I narrowed the field down to two finalists who I then video chatted with. Both women were young and beautiful but one stood out (a young woman from Norway) as being much more sincere and interested in getting to know me. The other woman, a young professional from Chicago, did not make our video chat a priority, imho, since she decided to take it from her car while en-route to a coffee shop instead of from a place where she was entirely focused on our call and nothing else (like I was).
The trip itself was pretty fair for what I wanted to get out of it. By my way of thinking, My Norwegian travel companion did not pack her bag with clothing she could actually use and wear on our trip, so I ended up buying her several “Hawaii Outfits” and a swimsuit on our first full day in Hawaii. She had brought a huge suit case filled with random, thrown together and largely mismatched nightclub outfits. I found that odd at the time… and I now suspect that the jumbled contents of this large suit case represented her complete collection of possessions in a “nomadic” sort of way. My Norwegian travel companion also had a ton of beauty supplies of every possible imagination and she ended up strewing these all around our bedroom. It got so bad that I would have to spend about ten minutes every night moving her stuff out of the way just so I had a place to sleep! She also did not seem well versed in how a shower / bathtub worked and I felt inclined to show her how to position the inner, plastic shower curtain inside the tub in order to avoid flooding the bathroom floor whilst taking a shower… oh boy!
On the whole… I would say that I got what I wanted out of my MissTravel experience. It was wonderful having a beautiful, sexy model caliber woman with me for this trip. I hope my Norwegian travel companion enjoyed my company and what she managed to see of Hawaii… she had a lot of “down time” dealing with things like bad hair extensions (which we fixed together by buying new ones and sewing clips to the new extensions as an unexpected but fun craft project and bonding experience) and smartphone issues with her new but not-so-waterproof Samsung Galaxy S8.
Alas, my Norwegian travel companion and I parted ways after our trip to Hawaii… largely because I challenged her to aim a little higher in life so that it would actually align more closely with the version of herself that she portrayed on her Instagram account. She was not at all amused by my suggestion and she made it clear that we would not be remaining in contact going forward. While I respect her decision, I do find her lack of gratitude very unsavory. Especially given how well I respected her boundaries during our trip and how well I treated her. For example, my Norwegian travel companion ditched me on our last night in Hawaii to go to a “party” allegedly hosted by some locals she had met. She was gone all night and she did not respond to calls or texts. I didn’t sleep at all that night out of worrying for her safety. I was so worried that at around 4 am I called the hospitals and the local jail to see if she was admitted or locked up. She finally turned up back in the morning (looking very tired and disheveled) less than one hour before we had to leave for the airport. Despite this, I bought her some souvenirs on our way to the airport along with some holiday gifts from Hawaii that she could give to her family back in Norway,
Regardless of the bizarre and sometimes annoying experiences I had on my trip to Hawaii with my Norwegian travel companion… If I am ever in need of travel companionship again, I would use this site.
Tip for consumers: Immediately Avoid and Block ANYONE…
1) Asking you for money up front.
2) Who refuses or defers in any way your request for a live video chat to verify who they are.
3) Who acts in a way that indicates they are not really interested in getting to know you for you.
4) Who’s actions do not align with their stated intentions.